This morning I woke up feeling very nervous about my trip to Glasgow. But my stomach wasn't the the only part of me to be all tensed up. On Friday i spoke to David about the fact that i'll be there. He was a little taken aback at first but later understood my reasons and said "of course" he will meet me when i'm there.
I have become reluctant to refer to him as my Master any more on here as i have doubts about any long-term arrangements, but i had missed him very much and was very happy to chat with him again but i fear i've invested so much emotionally in this whole story that at times I'm forced to stop and wonder: what am i doing?
It does seem i've pushed myself quite far out there with the trip, the long-distance ownership that at some point i'll have to try and figure out if this is going anywhere. But right now the main thing is i will meet him face to face and i will find out if the bond that has developed online will at all translate to proper real-life chemistry. He seems quite positive about it but i've had so many experiences go wrong in this area that i'm reluctant to be overly confident.
But this afternoon the cashier at Borders said: have a good time in Glasgow - which took me by surprise and i considered a good sign. Of course, this may have had something to do with the fact i had just bought a little travel guide to the city, but hearing the words come out of her mouth made it all sound real.
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