hello slave

Someone told me, hello slave.

People have such diverging ideas on what that means. You can be a sex slave, a house boy, a toilet slave, a dog, a pig, a pony... To tell someone hello slave, do you want to meet, is absurd. If i was a slave, i wouldn't have to be asked. i'm clearly not his slave, so why call me that. You can make me your slave, hunt me and make me submit. But i'm getting increasingly resistent to giving up that control of my own volition. And definitely not to just anyone who asks. So people will say: ha, you're not a real slave then if you want to chose. But i could tell them they're not real Masters if they can't get me to submit. But i don't go telling people whether they are, or not, real masters. That's hardly my role.

Other people want you to beg to be fucked or to suck them but, if they had a slave, if they actually owned one, if they'd bought and paid for it at some slave market, would the slave beg them? would they listen to a slave's prayers or would they just use it the way they feel and when they feel? If you own a pen, you don't want it to ask you to use it to write. It doesn't get you more in the mood to write if the pen asks you. You pick it up when you have something to write and when you're done you put it down. You don't pick it up again until you have to write something else. A pen, like a slave, is a tool. So why can't you use your slave the way you use anything else you own?

I think one of the reasons why one recent attempt at slavery failed is because the Master who was making use of me kept telling me that i'd have to deserve to make him cum. That did not compute for me. I didn't understand what i was supposed to do. Why couldn't he just fuck me when he was in the mood, cum if he wanted to cum, not cum if he didn't want to cum. Why do i have to deserve to make him cum? if i'm someone's slave, i don't have to "deserve" anything. Things are either given or not given to me. i have no control over it and i don't want any control over it. In the same way, when you want a slave to beg you to fuck him, is because you're still considering your slave as another person, with desires and wants, you're acting as if his desires mattered. He's doing it because you're telling him to do it. Why pretend that what he wants matters? And if what he wants does matter, why mock him and call him a slave?

Something that was always so fulfilling in my role as D's slave was that i felt i had really no control with him. Once, in a situation that i felt was hard for me, i broke down, couldn't take it anymore, i really wanted to leave and asked him to let me go home. I never had a safe word, and that meant i was powerless to resist him. I had to trust him, and i did. I could beg and he could give or deny. When i begged that night he eased things for me but ignored my request to let me go and i was so grateful to him for not letting me go. He kept me there and i slept next to my Master. But for the last time - after that he let me go for good.

So, someone told me hello slave and all this happened in my head.